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License to Conceive

You need a license to drive a car.  You need a license to sell newspapers on a street corner.  You even need a license to catch a lobster out of the ocean.  Yet any two irresponsible, opposite gender, post pubescent citizens can legally conceive a child without any means whatsoever of providing for that child.  We have third generation families in this country on welfare.  That’s grandparent, parent and child, all under one roof, collecting one or more forms of government aide.  That’s what they do.  They reach puberty, they conceive children and then they become wards of the state.  The more kids you have, the more programs you qualify for, the more freebies you get.   

If we can recognize the need to make sure a motorist knows to stop at a STOP sign, wouldn’t it be equally prudent to ensure future parents know what it means to provide for a child?  Would that be asking a lot?  Conventional wisdom would suggest they should have thought of it themselves,   but as the fourth generation of state wards is almost certainly on its way, perhaps there are some for whom this revelation will never be realized.

For those who are chock full of conventional wisdom, this is a rare and fortunate case of licensing which would never have to nuisance them.  We already know who the perpetrators are!  Start by licensing those who are already on some form of government aide.  If they want to continue to receive free money from taxpayers they must agree to temporary sterilization or mandated birth control.  It’s like already knowing which motorists have failed their driving test!

Licensing Citizens to have children isn’t some means of targeting a lower socio-economic demographic.  This isn’t an even an economic issue.  This is a livelihood issue.  All a perspective parent would have to do is prove they can feed, clothe, shelter and provide for a child.  Granted, most applicants would prove that by economic means:

“We earn income in U.S. dollars and we will use said income as currency in the marketplace to acquire all means of providing general health and well being for our child.”  Good answer!  License: APPROVED

Some applicants may prove their means by less conventional methods:

“My family has lived off the land for
generations.  We find everything we need in nature to provide for ourselves and our children.  It is the very foundation of our culture.”  Good answer!  License: APPROVED

Some applicants, however, will give answers which prove the need for licensing:

“This is exciting for us.  We really want to have this child.  We’d like the American taxpayer to provide that for us.”  Bad answer!  License: DENIED

“Children are a miracle.  They are a blessing from the lord.  God will provide.”  Bad Answer!  License: DENIED

Later on, as we become more civilized and refined we can ask really tough, unheard of questions like, “What are you going to do if you lose your job the day after your child is born?”  Baby steps for now, though.  Let’s not ask too much of those who are responsible for the nurturing, livelihood, and welfare of a human being. 

While licensing could relieve financial burden as soon as nine months after it’s implemented, its long term benefits could be even greater.  We have a chance here to potentially wipe out the better portion of our next generation of criminals before they’re even born.  Most of the criminal element in our society comes from homes and neighborhoods which are receiving government aide.  This is the same element of society who would be denied licenses and never have a chance to conceive future criminals.  We must be patient with realizing this benefit of licensing.  It will take roughly 12 to 13 years for crime prevention benefits to kick in, since that is the age when criminals emerge and start victimizing society.

There are no unplanned pregnancies.  There are no pregnancies which are just random acts of god.  Knowledge of procreation is not some revelation that sneaks up on everyone.  It’s the exact same thing that fish do.  Are there people out there who are going to try to claim they don’t know how conception occurs?  Are these the same folks who would then be applying for licenses so they could parent children?  Even worse, is there anyone who would actually mind that we put a stamp of approval on parents to ensure a child is properly provided for?  If there are, I have a stamp for them: DENIED!

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One comment on “License to Conceive

  • hey buddy how bout’ retro active abortion until the age of 18. If a person doesn’t become a positive member of society by that age, they are removed. If parents of said individual have 2 offspring which don’t make the grade, they are subsiquently FIXED and therefore will no longer burden society with their troublesome spaun. This concept will also lower the population of our now , busting at the seams prisons. Most criminals begin their exploits at a young age and if they are snuffed out before they develope into career criminals, there will be a lesser need for “rehabillitation institutions”. I know,,,,, this concept is inhuman. But, so is someone murdering and brutally raping an entire family during a home invasion!!

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